Just for funsies, I thought I’d fill-out one of those “getting to know you” character questionnaires for one of my NPCs – Nina “The Naga” Narisaga
1. What is your full name?
Nina Salindsai Narisaga
2. Date and place of birth?
11th Rova, 19 years ago
3. Tell me about your parents?
Tell you what? Dad fucked Mom. Mom got knocked up. Dad left. Mom didn’t give a shit about me. What’s to tell? Its a big cliché, all right? If it wasn’t for Rocky’s mom, Lila-Rose, I would have starved to death.
4. Brothers? Sisters?
Probably. Who the hells knows? No doubt Dad left a whole slew of brats around. Mom never carried another to term; but that stupid whore sure got herself in trouble every year.
5. Where/how do you live? (alone or with someone; in what kind of home?)
I live where I am. With my – uh – particular talents, staying on the move is crucial. Always had Rocky though – wherever he was stationed, that’s the closest thing I had to a home.
6. Do you have a job? If yes what is it?
I murder people for money. And yes, I’m fucking fantastic at it.
7. How do you look? Hair, eye and skin color, height, weight, any marks, style of dress.
What? You don’t have eyes? I’m middle height – I guess you’d say about five feet, six inches – and thin, but strong. Sexy too. Just enough curves, if you know what I mean. Dark hair, indigo eyes, thick juicy lips. Fuck yeah. I’m a piece.
8. Do you have any allergies, mental illnesses, physical weaknesses?
If I did, I wouldn’t make it public knowledge, would I? By the Dark Mother, you’re a real moron if you think so. But since I have to answer honestly – I’m allergic to saffron, or else I just hate that shit – and I murder for pay, so that could be considered a mental illness.
9. Are you left or right handed?
Ambidextrous.
10. Do you have any tics, certain habits or other things like that?
Things like that could get me killed. All I have is my reputation and my mad skills.
11. What do you usually carry in your pockets?
Blades. Poison. A garrote. You know, the usual.
12. Describe your childhood
Ugh. Back to that? Yes. I was born. My dad was a real piece of work; a wandering elf mercenary. I guess I got his martial prowess, and his surname, but that’s about it. I should have done like Rocky did – chose his own surname. He really earned it – you know? But wait – back to my childhood.
Mom was barely around; she worked a dozen different jobs, mostly whoring or tavern wenching – which was essentially the same thing. There was a widow on our block, she kept Rocky and I fed at first. When she died, Lila-Rose finally came out of her stupor and was a real mom to us. Rocky and I spent most of our childhoods in the woods around town. He learned to shoot. I learned to kill. Good times. Ran around with the local thieves guild. Got too big for such a piss-ant town, moved on. Then we hit Pitax. Everything changed. More on that later, yeah?
13. Did you like going to school?
You know, this makes me sound soft – but yeah, I did. I like knowing shit, and I like learning shit. How to do things better, kill things quicker, all that. I learned to speak a few other tongues, set traps, shiv a bitch in the kidneys and watch her bleed… Hah! But really, I did.
14. Where did you learn most of the things you know?
On the job, on the street, trial and error. I’m lucky. My instincts are good. I haven’t fucked up too much.
15. Who did you look up to when you were younger?
No one.
16. Did you like your family? Why/why not?
Not even a little. See previous answers. Sheesh.
17. What was your dream job?
Actually… this is dumb, but… I wanted to grow-up and be a dancer. I saw some gypsies when I was small, dancing in those spangled saris and castanets. But Mom couldn’t sell me to them and the next night, they were gone.
18. What kind of child were you?
Precocious. Clever. Quick.
19. What’s the most important thing you did in your life?
I slit the throat of Lord Mayor Claxis of Shav three years ago. My first big break, as they say. Only netted a few dozen platinum dragons, but it opened the way for a bunch of other jobs. And of course, the Serpenthelms.
20. Have you ever had any romantic relationships? And if they ended, why did you break up?
Yeah. When I was sixteen, Bertram Fennick told me he loved me and I thought he was sincere. I thought maybe, the feeling I had for him was love too. Turns out he just wanted to dip his wick. Caught him slipping it to a girl from the next street, so I sliced off his wick and shoved it down his throat.
Silly enough… sorta always thought someday Roc- well, never mind. Fuck.
21. Do you have a relationship now?
…no.
22. What is your greatest regret?
It will be if I die before I achieve vengeance for Rocky. Until then, I have no regrets.
23. What is the worst thing you ever did?
Uh… Everything.
24. What are you scared of?
Is it too cliché if I say – death?
25. Best memory? And worst?
Best: the slipping my feet into these great new little boots and feeling that sweet, sweet magic slip through my body. Mm. Worst: …when Little Jeb Blackfoot told me what happened to Rocky.
26. What are your religious views?
I know there are Gods. I just don’t give a flying fuck about any of them. What have they ever done for me?
27. Would you kill anyone? If yes, why?
Yes. Because I can, because I was paid, because they needed to die.
28. Would you die for anyone?
…That ship has sailed.
29. Do you make friends quickly?
I can fake it pretty good, yeah.
30. How would you describe your manners?
Lacking.
31. Turn ons?
Cash jingling in my purse. An attractive redhead with a well-formed body.
32. Turn offs?
Fatties.
33. Are you close to your family? Why/why not?
Mother of Demons, did you not fucking read my answers above? Shit.
34. If you desperately need help, who do you turn to?
…before those “Phoenix Rising” bastards killed him, I’d have turned to Rocky. He was always there for me.
35. Your hobbies?
I like to collect knives. Fancy ones. Pretty ones. Ones with handles carved to resemble naked people cavorting.
36. Your most treasured possession?
I have a ring – a token of our friendship – that I wear close to my heart.
37. Favourite color and food?
Random much? What are these two doing together? Ugh. Okay, so – this is going to sound conceited, but my favorite color is the color of my eyes. Its like, indigo; not found in nature, really. Its lovely. And food? Pistachios. They’re these little green nuts from the southern- Oh, you know them? They’re awesome, right?
38. Favourite book/genre?
Lachem’s Anatomy. It is a very detailed book with these incredible inked drawings of the anatomy of the major races. Humans, Elves, Dwarves, Hin, Gnomes. Oh man – have you ever tried to do a precise stab to the vital organs of a haffer? Talk about tiny.
39. Do you smoke/drink/do drugs? And if so, why?
No. They dull my sense and I need them sharp. I might have a cup of wine sometimes, but never more than two.
40. What is your favourite way of spending a Saturday?
I’m going to assume you mean the say before Sunday, which is Starday. And frankly, my favorite way to spend any day is at leisure with fresh minted jing in my pocket. Maybe, if I’m in a city and its safe to be seen, I’d buy an interesting book, find an out-of-the-way café, but a cup of tea and tell the waitress to keep ’em coming…
41. How do you deal with stress?
I take on extra jobs. Clears my head and weighs down my purse. Win-win.
42. Favourite joke?
You and your one true love walk into a bar. I slash one throat – whose is it? Duh – you’re still here.
43. How do you react if someone disturbs your routine?
Routine is dangerous. I avoid it. I also avoid people. So… there’s that.
44. Do you like yourself?
I do. I guess.
45. Introvert or extrovert?
I don’t even know what you’re asking. I keep to myself – its the nature of my line of work. But if I wanted to be all social and gregarious, I could. I do it sometimes, when the job requires it.
46. What are you good at?
Killing people for money. Also, scaling walls with my fingertips, finding oddly useful magical or alchemical items to use in a new and exciting way.
47. And what are you not good at?
Er – finding jobs that don’t involve murder?
48. What words describe you?
I’m tricksy, sly, devilishly clever and fucking hot.
49. what is your weakness?
If you’re just going to keep repeating yourself, I’m done here.
50. What would you want to add that you feel is important?
Look, I’m a bad girl. I know its wrong to kill people for cash. All life is sacred, blah blah blah. But frankly – its all I know. What else is a girl supposed to do? Fuck for money? No thank you. I’ll stick with murder, thankyouverymuch.
Maybe, after I seal the coffin on those fuckers who killed Rocky… I’;; re-evaluate…maybe.
Note: Image is “Black Mamba 1” by doc_ from SXC.hu