Today’s snippet, titled “Cock Forest”, is a piece I wrote about my PC in Mark’s new (Good) Pathfinder Campaign.
      Be forewarned, there may be mature themes and naughty language below.
– – – – – – – – – – –
      The sun, such as it was, was setting when at last Tom Parris rose from his knees. “It is done.”
      “Finally,” Sadie sighed. “This was the longest day of my life.”
      Rhiallis nodded, exhausted as well. They had travelled so hard to get back to Drezen and – hopefully – save their loved ones, found James and Marley and the others all perfectly well and unharmed, then hardly had a chance to hug them and wash the dirt from their tired bodies before returning to the wasteland once more. The return trip had been fraught with peril; they met a wicked man who turned out to be a wicked Glabrezu. He had granted Randa her heart’s truest desire and brought her parents back to her… sort of.
      Like Seraphina, they had been much changed and though it broke Miranda’s heart, she had had to help put them down with violence.
      Like Sadie, the encounter had left Randa distraught. Unlike the halfling, however, Miranda had needed time to mourn properly and when the Valorous Order departed Drezen once more, their numbers had dwindled further.
      Now only four remained, of the once numerous and glorious party.
      Sadie, valiant-hearted and quick as a shadow, with her undimmable smile and charm.
      Tom Parris, the least cleric-like cleric Rhiallis had ever known, always ready with a quip.
      Ezekiel, beautiful and brawny, a stalwart ally and one of Iomedae’s finest paladins.
      …and me. She remained hopeful. That somehow, despite all the odds, they would thwart the best laid plans of the Abyss and put the Worldwound back to rights. Yet…
      As she lay abed with James snoring gently beside her, spent from their loveplay and blessedly still alive despite Jesker’s suicide note, Rhiallis had begun to wonder if an end to the struggle was even possible. She did not share her doubts with James, who was so fervent as they broke their fast that he practically begged to take up his sword and go with her into the ‘Wound. She had asked him to stay behind, to protect the city and its innocents, and he had acquiesced, though Rhiallis half-expected to see him trotting up behind them on his destrier as soon as they were far enough out to make turning around pointless.
      She did not share her worries with the Valorous Order, either. They had plenty on their minds as it was, and her fears would not help anyone remain brave and true. Rather, she put on her most confident smile and waded into the fray as if nothing heavier than a feather weighted down her heart.
      Day after day they trudged through the ‘Wound. Sadie on point, mapping to the best of her ability as all four of them scouted around for landmarks, fresh water, anything that might help them survive in the wastelands. It had been so long since they saw any demonic foes – or enemies at all – that Rhiallis had joked to Sadie, “Don’t you think we’re a tad overdue for some fighting?”
      “Nah,” the hin had grinned up at her, “They’re pissing in their boots when they spot us coming through. Too scared to whimper, let lone attack us!”
      Rhiallis wished she had half that much confidence. Rather she had begun to have rather macabre premonitions that the denizens of the Worldwound had in fact put aside their differences to gather together and conspire to murder the Valorous Order as they slept.
      Not that she slept.
      It had been ages since she had needed to sleep, and though sometimes she closed her eyes and feigned it – just as she ate from time to time, not out of hunger but out of a sense of normalcy despite their precarious situation – her awareness had never been better.
      And she hated it.
      What she would give for a deep sleep! The kind where you lay your head on the pillow at sundown and did not stir from the comforting oblivion until dawn broke. The kind a good bottle or two of whiskey gave you, that left you with a foul taste in your mouth but blessedly, no nightmares and or dreams to haunt you afterward.
      Instead, she sat watch whilst her friends rested and tried not to think.
      That was more difficult than she had anticipated for a mind preferred to be active. But whether she spent the hours remembering the good times – those with Viggo, with Mira and Seraphina and Sadie, light moments on the road with Kumiko or Aimsley, even the distant, dusty memories of her mother and her childhood – or contemplating the bad times, Rhiallis was left with an emptiness in her chest. Better then, to mindlessly shuffle her cards until they the images had all but worn off or roll her dice until they were so rounded they hardly wanted to stop at all.
      The most excitement they had had since leaving Drezen had been the wagon of Lamashtites drawing cages of poor bedraggled beasts – all victims of horrific experimentation and ritual torture. Ezekiel had absolutely eviscerated one of their priests with a single blow so devastating it rent his body in two pieces. Sadie had darted in and out of the shadows, perplexing them, and Tom Parris had devastated them from a distance with his longbow.
      Rhiallis knew she had contributed. She even remembered drawing upon that wellspring of intangible power the Wardstones had granted her to lay into the female with all her might. Yet in the end, few details remained to her.
      As they put the animals out of their misery as humanely as possible, Rhiallis had wondered if she were losing her mind after all. Memories fading so quickly, gone before the battle was even over. Slaying dog-headed rabbits and snakes with two heads – one bird, one cat, while evil crept across the land and she grew ever further from home and from the one thing she longed for more than anything else.
      Now, after a full day spent at Delemere’s tomb, hallowing the ground Jesker had desecrated before committing suicide, Rhiallis was sure.
      She was losing her mind; slowly but surely, the Worldwound was killing her.
      It was taking the joy she had felt in the past, sucking it from her memories. It was taking the life from her lungs, the moisture from her skin, the brightness from her hair. She felt as if every day aged her a year at least.
      “I don’t know how much longer I’ll last out here, Sadie.”
      The halfling had taken her hand and squeezed it.
      “I mean it. I’m having trouble even remembering why we’re out here. It has started to feel- to feel-”
      “Hopeless?”
      She looked away. “By the Inheritor’s Heart, I don’t want to say yes, but damn it. Yes. I’ve been to feel like there is no hope left. We have lost so many friends, so many more will die before the ‘wound is sealed. If it can even be done-”
      “It can be done, Rhi.” Sadie drew Agnes Forthright from her belt and pressed the halfling-sized shortsword into her hand. “Agnes here knows it can be done and that a hin-folk will be there when it happens. I’m gonna be that halfling, and you’re gonna be the big blonde paladin with the golden sword. We’ll be the heroes of the age, Rhi. They’ll talk about us until the stars fall into the sea and time ends.”
      She managed a smile and nodded.
      “Plus, things are really fucked up. I mean, there’s no doubt about that. But-” Sadie resheathed Agnes and sat down beside her. “That doesn’t mean they’re gonna stay that way. The world is a big place and there’s magic here. Things we can’t even comprehend. We haven’t seen even a fraction of it. Of the things you’ll be capable of someday, and I’ll be able to do. Imagine Tom Parris bending the will of Desna herself to summon like, a herd of angels or something. Right? It will be incredible! We’ve got so many people to fight for, living and dead. There’s no time to wallow or worry. We have to just, get up off our asses and, you know, get going.”
      “You’re right, you know. You really are.”
      “I always am.”
      Sadie winked and bounced to her feet. Rhiallis wondered if it was her race or something unique within her that allowed her charm to win through no matter the odds.
      “Now, lemme grab my map and let’s get out of this stupid cavern. That tomb thing is creeping me out and Tom Parris says we’re gonna have to resurrect Jesker if we want to save his stupid fucking soul.”
      “We’ll add his name to our list, shall we?”
      Rhiallis climbed to her feet and followed her friends outside. Sadie began to explain where she had left off with her map and which way they were going to head. She had begun to sketch in the forest they had skirted previously and after a few strokes of her pencil, Rhiallis burst out laughing.
      She laughed so hard tears slipped down her cheeks. Ezekiel noticed the same thing and began to chuckle a moment later; Tom Parris scratched his chin then guffawed.
      “What?” Sadie frowned, looking up at them in turn. “What’s so fucking funny?”
      “The map-” Rhiallis began, breathless. “The map is-”
      Unable to speak for laughing, she just shook her head and pointed. After a moment, twisting the page around so she could see it from their perspective Sadie cackled.
      Ezekiel motioned to the map with a gauntleted hand. “We should name it something appropriate.”
      “Inappropriate,” Rhiallis said, “Is much more likely. Given how it looks.”
      “Morningwood Woods? The Man-Wood?” Tom Parris said, smirking.
      “To hell with it,” Sadie knelt down and sketched in a hasty name on her map. “We’re naming it ‘Cock Forest’.”
      They laughed again, and it felt so good Rhiallis forgot how depressed and morose she had been just minutes ago. A smile on her lips, she set out at the tail of the party, still chuckling to herself hours later.
      “Cock Forest,” she murmured, shaking her head. “That’s rich.”
      “Hey!” Sadie appeared beside her, so suddenly it made her trip over her own feet in surprise. “The map might not be great, but at least we’re good at something.”
      “What’s that?”
      “Surviving out here.” The hin reached up and took Rhiallis’ hand once more, briefly squeezing it. “We’re gonna survive, Rhi. Don’t doubt it anymore. Okay?”
      She smiled. “Okay.”

– – – – – – – – – – –

Note: Image is “King Jagiello Statue Central” by (Mulligand) from SXC.hu; edited by me